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I had a lot of fun doing this one. Again, in case you couldn't hear what I was saying, you can read the full script below.
In the dead void of space, you assume the role of Samus Aran's ex-boyfriend Isaac Clarke and embark on a rescue mission.
Your team, consisting of a black dude and a computer scientist with serious PMS, crash on board the USG Ishimura: A ship so advanced that its mechanical doors have loading times.
Everything seems okay until you find out everyone has turned into ravenous space zombies. What's worse is a majority of them are naked, forcing you to wonder what the fuck they were doing before they turned into what they are.
Being your team's bitch — I mean "mining engineer" — you end up running around doing a bunch of chores like getting things back online and taking out the Ishimura's trash.
After drop kicking a few unborn fetuses, you run into this insane guy who thinks that the zombies are like the second coming of Christ or... something. He then cuts the oxygen off to your area and you only have 24 seconds to get it back online.
The crazy guy then willing gets skull fucked by a necromorph, and turns into a... generic zombie you've killed a bunch of times before.
As it turns out, everyone on board went insane because a man-made artifact called "the marker"; which is a normal effect caused by most modern art.
Black dude dies, your wife was always dead, and PMS lady betrays you but gets owned by the final boss.
The final boss dies when you cough on it, and you get away. That's pretty much it... oh and one more thing.